We spend at least 70% of our time with our relationships:
• In private life
• At work
• In thought
An eternal saying: "Show me who you surround yourself with, and I'll show you what kind of life you live." - it really is true.
After extensive observations, researchers and professors from the most prestigious universities (such as Harvard and Yale University) have realized that:
Who you spend your time with deeply determines the kind of life you live. And the kind of life you don't live.
Below you can read sentences that had a profound impact on me - and helped me notice the relationships that are truly valuable and empowering:
1. Relationships are not an obligation, but a choice.
You are not less than if you are not in a relationship. Why? Because your value is not determined by your relationship, but by how much you live a life of self-identity. Remember: You can always be there for yourself. A nurturing relationship adds to that, not takes away from it.
2. You have the right to walk your own path in your relationships.
Don't necessarily choose what others expect of you. Let your relationships be shaped by your own needs, not by the ideas of others. Ask yourself:
"Is this really about me/us, or about other people's expectations?"
3. If it's important to you to be yourself in a relationship, don't give up on yourself for the other person, and don't hide anything about yourself from the other person.
Practice honesty, even with yourself. If you feel like you're losing yourself, stop and ask:
"What am I not giving myself right now?"
4. Working relationships are flexible and allow room for development
Growth is an important element of a relationship. This requires openness and flexibility, which ensures that there is always room for improvement.
It is worth asking the question:
"What can I contribute to the relationship - and what can the relationship contribute to me?"
5. If you are open to change, the relationship will survive.
Talk honestly about new challenges and goals. Ask:
"What would bring ease here?"
Openness brings freshness.
6. Self-knowledge helps you let go of fears and makes relationships more playful
Give yourself time to better understand how you work. When you connect without fear, your relationships will be more uplifting.
7. If you don't judge others, you can enjoy richer relationships
Practice allowing. When something bothers you, stop and ask:
"Is what I'm thinking really true?"
Instead of judgment, choose curiosity. What gift can you discover in what you have judged so far?
8. If the foundation is respect, trust, honesty, vulnerability and appreciation, then freer connections can exist - it's a Process
These 5 elements bring new possibilities to the relationship, but they require continuous energy. It is worth practicing these 5 elements not only with others, but also with yourself, which contributes to getting to know yourself and the other person more deeply.
Summary:
Let's stay honest, curious, and never lose faith that it's possible to have uplifting relationships. It's not what our parents, society, or others choose, it's what you choose. Not everyone will like the way you live your life - but you don't have to conform to anyone. Relationships are a reflection of your relationship with yourself.
A relationship is a compass or a labyrinth to the life you truly desire.